Road rage

Radio Commentary

It seems that more and more drivers are acting out their anger when they get behind the wheel.

After they've been cut off, tailgated, or slowed down by a car in front of them, these angry drivers can even commit acts of violence.

Teaching your children about road rage, and how to prevent it, is vital to their health and well-being.

One study of more than 10,000 incidents of aggressive driving revealed that at least 200 people were killed and another 12,600 people were injured because of driver anger.

Remember that you are a role model for your children. Keep your anger in check, and model behavior for your teens that shows them how to be a safe driver.

One good rule: Don't take actions that might offend other drivers. These might include cutting drivers off, driving slowly in the left lane, or tailgating. Avoid these actions at all costs.

Also, don't engage. One angry driver can't start a fight unless another one is willing to join in. So take a deep breath and move on.

It also helps to “steer clear.” Give angry drivers lots of room and avoid eye contact. If an angry driver is following you or using a car as a weapon against you, call for help.

When your children are riding in the car with you, remember that they will copy your behavior. Be a good role model for their sake as well as for your own.

Reducing gun violence

Radio Commentary

Sadly, firearms are second only to motor vehicle accidents in their claim on young lives.

Research indicates that educational efforts aimed at persuading young people to behave responsibly around guns are limited in their effectiveness.

Parents must monitor children’s exposure to guns and protect them from unsupervised use. Any stored guns in a home should be locked, unloaded, and separated from ammunition.

Community leaders can also help. They can promote young people’s safety by sending unequivocal messages that gun violence is not an acceptable way to resolve conflict. 

It’s also been shown that requiring safety features on guns can reduce unintentional shootings among young children and adults.

In addition, emerging technologies will enable manufacturers to personalize guns and prevent unauthorized users from operating them.

Most important, as a society we must limit the flow of illegal guns to youth. Federal and state laws regarding gun sales should be tightened so that fewer weapons are accessible to young people.

The physical, economic, and emotional toll of gun violence against young people is unacceptable, regardless of one’s position on adult ownership and use of guns.

Parents and reading

Radio Commentary

Sometimes the list of parental responsibilities can appear to be overwhelming. Generations ago it seemed sufficient to feed, clothe, and house a child, providing love and warmth whenever possible.

But the list of “must-do’s” has grown through the generations, and the impact of parental involvement has come into focus.

One item on the list, as most parents know, is the “must-do” of encouraging reading. And it’s clear that most parents are doing a good job of encouraging young children to read. 

But research shows that their help plummets drastically once youngsters reach age nine.

A recent study showed that more than half the parents with children under age nine said they read with their children every day. 

But only 13 percent of parents with older children reported that they read with them on a daily basis. And shortly after parental reading involvement drops, a child’s television viewing increases dramatically.

As the late Al Shanker, president of the American Federation of Teachers, said: “Parents are doing a good job of helping their children learn to read. But they give up too soon. Once a child begins to read independently, a parent’s job isn’t over. It simply changes.”

The study found that teachers see a major gain in reading ability when parents remain involved.

As parents review their “must-do” list of responsibilities, reading should remain high on that list.

Opinion differences

Radio Commentary

There will come a time when you and your child have different opinions. It’s inevitable.

Accept this fact and understand that depending on a child’s age, personality traits, and peer influences at times, he or she is certain to see things from a different perspective at times.

Accept these differences of opinion and use the opportunity to discuss the topic in question.

Encourage independent thinking and listening to others. Getting to know people better and understanding their perspectives can be vital to future emotional and psychological well-being. 

It’s also very healthy and affirming for children to hear you say these words when appropriate: “You’re right — I hadn’t thought about it that way.”

When children grasp the idea that we can always learn something new and see something from another point of view, they are more likely to keep open minds as they engage in a spirited defense of their own beliefs.

Help them flesh out their arguments and approach issues from different sides. Show them that everyone is entitled to an opinion but that not all opinions are equally valid, especially if they are based on emotion or misconceptions, rather than fact.

A thoughtful debate is often very educational and stimulating. Helping your children become articulate, thoughtful, and respectful will help them at all stages of their lives.

Location

Radio Commentary

Children use all of their senses to learn about the world around them.

The objects that they can touch, see, smell, taste, and hear all help them understand the link between a model and the real thing that it represents. 

A good example is a map, which represents land masses. Using information from maps and models can help guide your children to a better understanding of the concepts of geography.

For example: Find puzzles of the United States, the world, or even California. By touching and looking at the pieces, children can get a better understanding of where one place is located in relation to others.

Point out where your home is located and then point out where a distant relative or friend lives. Show how far away it is and what route you would travel to get there. 

It also helps to use images from books or the Internet to help your children associate geographic terms with visual images.

A picture of a desert, for example, can stimulate conversation about the features of a desert — dry and barren. 

Identifying lakes and rivers can start discussions about wildlife and early settlers.

Talk about many different places with your children and help them imagine what it would be like to visit them.

All these discussions help children get a solid concept of geography and why it is important.

Ingredients for success

Radio Commentary

Four simple ingredients can make any child more successful in school.

First comes support. Young people need to know that someone is in their corner. They can be successful if they feel that someone cares deeply about whether they succeed or fail, and if someone is proud of their successes and their efforts.

Second is having boundaries.

Children need adults who act like adults.

Parents who are firm and loving have children who do better at school, feel more self-confident, and get into less trouble than children whose parents are either too strict or too lenient.

Third is empowerment. All people need to know they make a difference.

Encourage children to provide service to others. Make sure they take part in school, community, or religious organizations that give them the chance to serve and contribute.

And fourth is constructive use of time. After school, children still need to be involved in constructive activities. Research shows that children who watch more than 10 hours of TV per week are less successful in school than those who watch less.

So be sure young people have challenging and interesting activities to do after they leave the classroom each day.

These four elements — support; boundaries; empowerment; and constructive use of time — have proven to make a big difference in a child’s success at school and in life.

First two Rs for testing

Radio Commentary

High-stakes testing is a fact of life. Students of all ages will take standardized tests throughout their school careers. 

While some students are naturals at test-taking, others need help to do their best.

A publication titled “Principal Communicator” outlined four conditions that parents can use to help their children feel confident about tests.

They all start with “R”: Being Receptive, Relaxed, Ready, and Rested.

Being “Receptive” is important. Parents can help children develop a receptive attitude toward school in general, and testing in particular.

They can do this by making sure students understand that testing is merely a part of the learning process, and that it is a measuring stick for how much they have learned. 

The second “R” is for “Relaxed.” Anxiety can block the best-prepared student from doing well on a test. 

Two effective ways to overcome anxiety are the third and fourth “R’s” — getting Ready by studying well in advance, and being Rested rather than staying up late to cram the night before the test.

It’s important to help children avoid getting hung up on how hard a test might be, or the consequences of doing poorly. Remind children about the satisfaction that comes from trying their best.

Make sure they know you think they will do well, but that your approval of your child as a person does not depend on a test score.

Decrease in biking

Radio Commentary

Just a few generations ago, in the 50s and ’60s, half of all children bicycled or walked to school. Today, only one in 10 does so.

In fact, even among school-age children who live within two miles of school, only about two percent ride bicycles to get there.

These figures have implications for health, fitness, and safety.

The Santa Barbara Bicycle Coalition cites several major reasons for the decline:

• As we widened roads for cars, we decreased safety for bikers and walkers, leading to a lack of space for children to walk and bike safely.

• Excessive media stories about the dangers of child abductions, gun violence, drugs, and often other real-but-overblown-concerns add to a sense of danger and worry for parents.

The truth is that automobiles are by far a bigger threat to children than all these other potential threats combined.

• With both parents working, for longer hours, many try to compensate through the perceived ‘gift’ of driving children around.

These changes have contributed to increased rates of obesity among young people.

They have also helped foster a loss of independence that comes from bicycling.

As was the case with recycling and smoking, it will take changes of awareness and attitude to change this condition. We should all try to help.