In these times when everyone is
very rushed, it’s more important than ever to take the time to talk with your
children.
This is especially the case
with teenagers who may be going through some challenges.
Timing your talk is critical.
Choose a time when your child seems most receptive.
Here are some quick, practical,
teen-tested phrases for adults to use successfully in communicating with
adolescents:
• First, say nothing for a while — just listen.
• Then say:
“I’ve heard you say…” and paraphrase your child’s point.
• Ask: “Is that accurate?”
• “Say: “What were your options or choices of
action?”
• Ask: “How were others affected by your
actions?”
• Then ask:
“How could you have handled things differently?”
This sequence of comments –
listening, paraphrasing, confirming, asking about options, focusing on others,
and then reaching a good conclusion— are all positive ways to communicate with
a teenager.
